Cheerleaders and other headaches...

Ah, the first day of summer. Well, not quite. I did have to wake up at the crack of dawn this morning to go take the ESL certification exam. Did my school require this of me? No. The State of Texas? No. Do I just like racking up certifications for fun? No. Alas, my stupid teacher certification program is making me. Why? Because they are jerks. And the real kicker... if I don't pass it by August they are going to charge me $300 a month until I do pass it. Sooo ready to be done with this program. It's been one requirement after another that they keep tossing my way.

The test was muy dificil. Yes, dear reader, although I was blessed with some awesome spanglish skills, this test was no bueno - full of tricky situational questions and grammar rules... blah! Hopefully I passed. We'll see in about 3-5 days. After studying for this test though, I decided I have no desire whatsoever to enter grad school. My schooling days are over folks.

Oh and the testing site I went to was like checking into prison. I couldn't bring in anything, I had to be searched with a metal wand and then when I took my David Yurman bracelets off and set them on my desk because they kept clanking into the table, my proctor told me I wasn't allowed to take them off. Like I'm sure I had secret ESL test tips etched into the grooves of my bracelet. Psh.

So that was my morning in a nutshell. Let me tell you about yesterday...

Yesterday was a half-day at school for teachers to finish things up, turn in keys, textbooks, etc. I had my cheer girls come by to pick up their uniforms and practice outfits. Before they came, I asked last year's sponsor if she gave the girls her cell phone or anything for them to be able to contact her with questions, problems, etc. She said that she did. So against my better judgement, I gave 14 twelve year olds my cell phone # with strict instructions not to abuse it. So I'm sitting at home around 1:30pm trying to enjoy the start to my summer when ring, ring, ring...

Me: Hello?

Cheerleader #1: Ms. C?

Me: Yes

Cheerleader #1: I think I have the wrong uniform top, I think Cheerleader #2 has mine and I have hers.

Me: Ok, well why don't you just bring your top to camp in July and we will switch them out then. Will that work?

Cheerleader #1: Yes.

Me: Ok, great...bye

20 minutes later....ring, ring, ring...

Me: Hello?

Cheerleader #2: Ms. C?

Me: Yes

Cheerleader #2: I think Cheerleader #1 has my uniform top.

Me: Yes, I have already heard about it. Do you see C#1 very often?

Cheerleader #2: No

Me: Ok well you have two options. Either you two wait until July to switch tops or coordinate getting together and switching before then. Will that work?

Cheerleader #2: Ok

Me: Great, bye.

45 minutes later....ring, ring, ring...

Me: HELLO.

Cheerleader #1's dad: My daughter, Cheerleader #1, did not get the correct uniform. We think Cheerleader #2 has her top.

Me: Yes sir, I have already talked to both girls and they can either wait to switch out at camp or meet up and do it before then.

Cheerleader #1's dad: That is not acceptable. I will not tolerate my daughter's uniform at someone else's house.

Me: Um, ok, well I'll be happy to give you cheerleader #2's phone number so that you can make plans to swap tops.

Cheerleader #1's dad: Ok fine.

Me: Her number is ###-###-####.

Cheerleader #1's dad: We also think Cheerleader #3 might have another piece of my daughter's uniform.

Me: Ok, here is her phone number. ###-###-####.

Cheerleader #1's dad: Ok, thank you. We'll be in contact.

So apparently my new job for the summer is Cheerleader Crisis Hotline.

FML. WWSSD? What would Sue Sylvester do?

Happy first day of summer! ;)